4.30.2007

Knowing.

Tonight the genre-bending band Cake played at the CU campus. They played at a corporately sponsored venue, a tragedy for another lengthier post.
Anyway, even though the show wasn’t at the Fox, I would still like to share the experience. If that’s all right with all of you, of course.
The show started at 8, but my cronies and I weren’t to interested in seeing the opening act, so we showed up around 9. Our mistake. As it turns out, only the first 1500 people through the doors got an all-mighty wristband that allowed them onto the floor. Everyone else had to sit in the stands and watch the band from afar.
So, me and a couple people were sitting at the top of the stands trying to figure out how we could sneak in to the pit. As we were sitting there someone came up and tapped me on the shoulder. I turn around and it was a fellow bouncer. He had on the requisite “security” shirt and had a big smile on his face.
“Hey buddy, I just want you to know that you are my friend. Its pretty bold of you to wear a Leftover Crack shirt to a Cake concert.”
He, of course, was talking about the shirt I was wearing. I had gotten it on a road trip to New Mexico to see the band at a tiny venue in Santa Fe. Long story short, I decided to try to take advantage of my situation.
“If you were in fact my friend, you could scrounge me up a wristband to get me down onto the floor.”
So he handed over a bright pink wristband. Mission accomplished. Now I just had to get a couple more for my buddies so they could join me down on the dance floor.
I chatted up my newfound friend and found out he was also a bouncer at the Boulder Theater, another venue in town. It also turns out he was a friend of my roommate Dan.
Danny, our new friend, went and got a couple bright green wristbands and each and every one of us got to enjoy the concert from a little less far away. That’s right, no lousy uncomfortable stadium seating for us!
The moral of this story, because what good is senseless rambling without a moral, is that knowing people who know people is a very good “skill” to have.
There’s a couple off nights at the Fox coming up, so I’ll see you kids in a couple days.

4.27.2007

A Bad Calm.

One thing that amazes me is the type of people who go to concerts.
Generally speaking, I would assume that if you paid to see a concert you would have a good time. But at every concert there is at least one of the following: someone to drunk to see the stage, someone to high to make it down two steps to the pit area, and someone to angry to realize they basically paid to get in an argument with me about the flash on their camera.
At Wednesday night’s show, Andrew Bird and the Apostle of Hustle, I was lucky enough not to witness any of the former. There were people drinking, but they were being smart about it, and there was one guy smoking pot and a chick using the flash on her camera, but they both cut it out when I asked them to. I didn’t have any problems with these folks. In fact, I didn’t have any problems at all.
Now, I know what some of you may be thinking. “Dominic, why are you complaining? Wouldn’t you, as a bouncer, be ecstatic at the lack of confrontation?”
I don’t want anyone to get the idea that when I’m working security I go looking for fights, quite the opposite, in fact. As it turns out, if I pour enough charisma through my teeth, most people are happy to stop doing whatever it was that sparked my ill-gotten attention in the first place.
But, when a crowd of people pays to see a concert, I have to imagine they would want to ENJOY the concert. Apparently the fans of Andrew Bird aren't into the whole “moving to the music” scene that so many fans of so many other types of music are down with. To use common vernacular.
Now, I am not the type to say people aren't “doing the right thing” at concerts. I guess I am of the school of thought that you should be doing something other than standing when you go to a concert. I'm not here to pass judgment on you if you choose not to “groove” or “get funky.” However, I will say this: working security for a crowd that doesn’t move is kind of scary. Its really similar to what I imagine babysitting a bunch of heroin addicts must be like. It’s as if you are watching the conglomerate, fully aware of their affliction, and you are constantly on edge waiting for something to spark a riot.
I'm not kidding. “Enforcing” this crowd was a very intense experience. I was constantly waiting for someone’s foot to get stepped on or for a sneeze to explode into a full out brawl. It might have been the boredom, but at one point I saw a kid lift up his hand to readjust his hat and I could have sworn he was going to clobber the girl in front of him.
And there I was, on my toes, ready to save the day.
The moral of the story here kids is that if you are going to go to a show, please enjoy yourselves. Feel free to experiment with whatever you think you can get away with. Maybe even take it over the edge a bit too. I promise that if I don’t like it, I will let you know. Besides, who knows the next time you’re going to be able to pay twenty bucks to hang out with 700 good friends of yours and listen to some sweet tunes?

In other news, Friday night is the LAST EVER Phix show at the Fox. This is good news because it means one less jam band to keep track of. For those of you who enjoy twenty-minute instrumentals and weed, please stop by.

4.24.2007

Inauguration.

Here it is ladies and gentlemen, the much-awaited blog. I hope you’ve all been able to contain yourselves for this long.
Where to begin?
I am a bouncer at the Fox Theatre in lovely Boulder, Colorado. I haven’t been there long, but I’ve already paid some of my dues so here I am spilling my guts out.
First off, I have a bit of a disclaimer. In no way, shape, or form am I professing to be anything but the lowest part of the security totem pole. There are much more qualified people that belong in my position, but as a writer I am compelled to document what I experience. That being stated, do not, I repeat DO NOT, expect me to represent anything but myself. I am not here as a figurehead for the security staff of the Fox Theatre, or of the Theatre itself. I am me. That’s it, nothing more.
Secondly, I make no promises towards the entertainment value or steady occurrences of my writing. I will write only what I experience, and only when I see fit to share those experiences.
Thank you for humoring my introduction. For now, I am done. There is nothing left but to go.
On another note, if you aren’t to busy this evening, I will be working the Three Bucks Three Bands show at the Fox. If you’ve got three dollars and some free time to kill, please come support locals bands in their attempt to bare their souls.